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problem with a picture perfect life
Best o’ the Bitch, Bitch’in Life

The Problem With A Picture Perfect Life

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I’m working on a new document for our country, and I’m going to call it, “The Declaration of Interdependence.”

Forget the current Declaration of Independence. I mean, let’s get real, people — the pursuit of happiness is a thing of the past.

But the pursuit of perfection? In a way that is seen and “liked” by everyone else? Now that is 100% our national M.O. nowadays.

Don’t agree? Witness the proliferation of perfect as illustrated by our online profiles. Perfect selfies, perfect pets, perfect children, perfect meals, perfect vacations, perfect humor, and so on.

Now, dig deep and think about the lengths you’ve gone to in projecting a perfect existence.

Want me to go first?

My friend once threw a perfectly fabulous party. Then someone snapped a perfectly staged photo, where everyone looked, well, perfect… and I was the only that blinked. And also had a perfectly protruding belly roll. Plus a perfectly captured double chin.

I was mortified when the picture began to spread far and wide on social media.

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Unintended Facebook
Bitch’in Life

5 Unintended Consequences of Facebook

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Has this ever happened to you?

You glance down at your email and see a “friend request” from Facebook. You think to yourself, “that’s nice, someone wants to be my friend.”

Upon further inspection, you see a name that you’d long ago forgotten about, thanks to time and its magical erasing qualities. All the healing of old wounds and so forth.

But now here is this interloper in present day, and although ignoring it (path of least resistance) or declining it (active HELLS TO THE NO) are both viable options, the poke is there, and it’s a painful jab in the virtual ribs for old times’ sake.

While Facebook and all social media are amazing in many ways — for me, 99% of the connections I’ve been happy for, rekindling old friendships in a positive, fun, and even Zen way — there are the those sticky situations that can lodge in your craw and make you wish you could log off and hide under a rock until the next millennium.

Unintended Consequence #1: Facebook, which was meant to be a fun and instantaneous way to socially network in the present, can also be a painful way to reopen some formerly closed channels of the past.

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Best o’ the Bitch, Bitch’in Life

The Zen of Facebook

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Lately I’ve been hearing from friends that they are done with Facebook.

They’re fed up of looking at pictures of what people they knew 20 years ago are eating for dinner. (And who knew there were so many uses for kale… all equally unphotogenic?)

Tired of looking at someone else’s vacation photos while they toil away at home.

Repulsed by the look-at-what-my-baby/child-did-oh-my-goodness-isn’t-s/he-cute/smart/athletically gifted/talented?

Sickened by sappy salutes to spouses and nostalgic shout-outs to people they don’t know… and would never care to, either.

Pissed off with political posts and views, and especially offended by the realization that someone they used to be friends/lovers/coworkers with is the opposite of anyone they’d ever want to know.

Over. The. Oversharing.

I will admit I have those moments, too. Sometimes I feel like a creepy voyeur when I check my Facebook feed. Other times, I curse the time sucked by feeding my sad addiction.

As a blogger, though, I rationalize that I have to be social and keep myself “out there.” Even if in reality I’m home alone avoiding going out into the real world.

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